In order to justify why my first post from Japan is three weeks into my stay here, I feel it is appropriate to discuss the process of getting internet in Japan. This is related to something which I will call the Myth of Hi-Tech Japan.

To set the stage, I currently do not have internet at my apartment, which I moved into 22 days ago.

I sprung for a smart phone despite the offensively bad package, so I do have a lifeline though which facebook, Line, and even video chatting can be delivered — but when it comes to typing anything of substance, I need a keyboard! My town does not seem to have any internet cafes or Starbuckses, although I could take a train into the city if I was really dedicated (so I’m not really off the hook for not writing).

The “JET Alumni” as they are called (people who did the program before and lived to tell us newbies about it) warned us that getting internet could take up to six weeks. I didn’t believe them. “Oh,” I thought, “They moved to Japan a few years ago, surely things will have modernized by now.”

I was wrong.

What I didn’t realize is how much Japan loves paper (not as much as it loves plastic, however that is a topic for another post). PaperWORK on PAPER, to be exact. Did you think information would be wirelessly transmitted between futuristic glasses or by bumping your iTabletRobots against one another? WRONG! Did you think the bank tellers would at least enter you information on a computer? WRONG! Everything is done by paper, with multiple signatures required which results in the paper being passed back and forth between physical locations. It’s the Myth of Hi-Tech Japan. On the upside, at least we don’t have to deal with a call center.

The JETs who arrived in the last year or two have had a slight advantage, as we received our foreign resident cards when we arrived at the airport. Previously JETs had to first register their residency at their city hall, then apply for the card and wait for it arrive before they could apply for other important things like bank accounts or phones. This delay then cascaded down to anything that required a bank account or phone number to apply. Such as internet. Having the card from the moment we arrived probably has shaved a week or two off the average wait experienced by JETs from earlier.

A few weeks ago, I filled in a form for internet service at my home. I wrote my desired username in the space provided. There was also a space for my password, but I was told not to fill that in. “Ha ha, of course not, that would be crazy,” I thought. Yesterday (my 21stday in my apartment) I was returned the same piece of paper, and this time asked to create a password and write it in the appropriate spot. Had there been a mix up in the instructions previously? No, there was a pretty good reason (depending on how you look at it). For some reason the paper had to be given to my landlord for approval, and if my password was written on it then obviously the landlord could read it and it wouldn’t be very secure. Honestly I don’t know why my landlord needs to sign this paper, but I trust that getting this person’s approval is important and necessary.

I think it is safe to assume I will not have internet at home before September. After that, as my computer apparently has no ethernet jacks, I will be required to navigate the process of setting up a wireless router in Japanese. All the reports I have read indicate it is tear-inducing. Ganbatte kudasai!!!